Tuesday, August 7, 2012

It's been a good ride

My dear sweet Carson, This time next week we will be preparing to send you to the big Pre-K. Wow. I can hardly believe it. My friends have all been asking me how I am doing with you starting school and I've been like, "Fine. I'm happy about Grove and I think he has great kids in his grade..." all the while not being very sure why they were asking me that question. Then a few days ago, you said to me, "Mom, I'm starting school soon and then I'll turn FIVE!". And then it hit me. Like a ton of bricks. My time with you as my little baby boy is ending. And, sweet sweet boy, what a wonderful ride it has been. You have been a blessing to me since you were a newborn baby who started sleeping through the night at 5 weeks. You knew I needed sleep, and I thank you for that. Espcially since I worked. Speaking of working, you never, ever, made me feel guilty about that because you were always so happy to stay home with your Jessie or to go to Mothers Day Out when you got older. And even though you were so happy to stay, you greeted me with open arms almost tackling me down most days when I got there to pick you up. You have been easy going, sweet, eager to please us, adventurous, absolutly beautiful and have been MORE than I could have ever DREAMED of. It has been an incredible joy to watch you grow into the sweet, tough, funny, little boy you are. I pray that you hold onto your joy and your love as you enter this new world. I pray that you know, really know, how special you are. I pray that you know how LOVED you are. I pray that you STAY who you are despite age. Bottom line sweet boy, I'm oh so proud and excited for you to grow up, but I may just not be that ready to let you go. To let you be more influenced by friends than by your family. To spend more time with your teachers than with me. To not have my special time on Fridays with just you and your sister while dad works. I have LOVED being home with you. You took care of me through a pregnancy, and you could barley talk. You have taught me how to slow down and enjoy the moment. You have been my little buddy. The love of my life. And while I know we are SO far from being done raising you, and that you still need me for SOOO many reasons, this is just an end of a very special time. And I just want you to know that you are the best thing I have every done. And it is an honor to be your mom.