But WAIT! There's more!

In all the excitement and nervousness of my lunch hour I forgot to elaborate on the part that has ME most excited. Like so excited that sometimes I wanna cry excited. I get to teach full-time at SSC again!!!!! There really aren't enough exclamation points to describe how happy I am about this. I have been fortunate enough to have only two full-time jobs, both of which I LOVED, both of which I resigned from and both of which I've returned to. And they say you can never go home!

The day I left SSC was the day that I realized just how much I LOVED the job. I always knew it was a good job, with great hours, great flexibility as a mom and great co-workers that treated each other like family, but I realized my last day as I drove home and found myself crying, that I LOVED that job.

While in Katy, I've had to TRY to ignore the "happenings" at SSC so that I do not get sad all over again. I've tried to stay in the loop the best I can, but lets face it, if you're not there, your not in. I've continued teaching online and like it, but it's so different. I really like students. Even the ones that I really don't like, I like, in a strange way. And I really really miss being in the classroom. And I get to go back!!!

I am so thankful to those who allowed this to happen. The new role will be a little different. When I left I was the only psyc instructor that was full-time now there will be 2.5. (our division splits one lady's time with another dept.) Needless to say, I viewed it as "my" program and that will change. But I couldn't be more excited not to be on my own with one of the largest class loads on campus. AND, I get to help out my good pal Tracy J with Sociology classes! That will be a ton of fun and I'm excited for that challenge.

So, I'm excited. About so many things. And thankful for so many more!

PS. Things went GREAT with Josh and his boss today. We are both feeling SO much relief AND he gets to keep working for a few weeks, so I'm not needing lodging. Yet....

Warning: The following may read like my mind thinks...

I think I mentioned a few blogs back how we are addicted to change, well I'm writing this with my heart beating fast and feeling a little like I could puke...You see, my husband is finally doing what we've spent the last month and a half painfully deciding. He is quitting his job to go into business with my dad.

I know that sounds great. What's the deal? Well. He's initially loosing a good chunck of his salary to do this. It won't be for forever, just a few years, and I'm going back to work to make up the difference, but seriously, walking away from a high salary, knowing that in a year it could be DOUBLE??? It's scary. Makes me wanna puke. BUT, he will be getting to buy in and be part OWNER in the company he works for. Not only will this be a total motivator, it will mean more money. But change this big is still just scary.

I have been SO proud of Josh for all he has done at TS Dudley. In only five years he's gone from a rookie landman who knew nothing, to crew chief, to an associate prospect manager. And has been guarenteed another promotion within 6 months from now. He has done in 5 years what many landmen work 15-20 for. He has done well. I am proud of him.

BUT. We have debated and prayed, prayed and debated and we feel that this change will allow us to have a more well balanced life.

It's all about quality of life and finding a happy balance between work and friends and family.
Philip Green

This is just one of the quotes I've found while soul searching lately. And I feel that this quote is what has been the driving force behind our decision. Josh and I value our marriage above most things in our life second only to our children. And staying with Dudley doesn't allow for the marriage we hope to have. I am simply not a wife that is happy with my husbands credit card instead of seeing my husband. We value our time together and want to live life TOGETHER. We BOTH want to raise our kids, we want to see their school play at 10am and want to put them to bed together every night. We feel this job will allow us to enjoy our life. We want to work our butts off in our 30's, work in our 40's and hardly work in our 50's. Josh wants to be his OWN boss instead of working 14 hour days for someone else.

Now, he is going to be in for some HARD work for the next few years. Have I mentioned he doesn't know a THING about insurance? Again. Scary. Not to mention the fact that he has to earn his keep...scary.

But Josh WILL suceed. He has never failed at anything he has put his mind to. He will love it and he will do a good job. And he will be happy. Which is what I want more than anything. Happiness.

While I am scared, if I haven't mentioned that before, I am also so EXCITED I am about to BUST! Because this obviously means we get to move home.

I simply can't wait to live in Oklahoma again. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE LOVE LOVE Katy, there's NO town like it in OK. Wish I could pack the town and my friends and bring it all with me, but I can't.

I don't really fit here. I am an OKLAHOMA girl, but I never knew that till I left. Having all the options around here is FANTASTIC, but it overwhelms me so I choose nothing. There is so much I feel I have to keep up with here- and I don't want to play. I don't want my steak to cost $50 with no sides, I just want to have my dad slaughter a cow and throw it on the grill. I wanna hang out in my trailer at the lake and karaoke at a place called the Coconut Shack, where mullets have not gone out of style. And the best part is, I wanna teach IN THE CLASSROOM at SSC and I can! YEA!

Are there things I'm gonna miss? YES! For example, HEB. Oklahoma has no idea what a grocery store should be like. You should be able to shop while sampling wine. You should be able to shop in a HEALTH SECTION. You should be able to buy fresh fish, sushi, granola. You should be able to shop in a CLEAN store where the checkout lines are OPEN. HEB, I will miss you.

Oklahomans wonder why they are fat... Well, it's because there is no where to exercise. NOT IN CINCO RANCH! There are MILES AND MILES like HUNDREDS of MILES of sidewalk. This is where the sidewalk does NOT end. It's fantastic. And everyone walks, runs, bikes ON these sidewalks and burns CALORIES....Cinco Ranch I will miss your sidewalks.

Wonder why only 30% of Oklahomans have a college degree? It's because we don't value our school systems. The schools down here are nicer than Universities. They have fine arts centers, great athletic facilities, WELL PAID teachers. And students who graduate ready for college. Texas has schools figured out. Texas schools...well we don't go yet...

Katy is hard to leave. There are great opportunities, we've made great friends, Carson's made great friends, we've been embraced with love by our small group. We will miss the town and all those in it.

I am also restarting two of my biggest LOVE/HATE relationships, school and running.

I have decided to start working on my PhD this fall in Health Psychology and Behavioral Medicine... I know MORE SCHOOL? My best friend Tracy says "You sure do love school". But I don't really. And I do. Maybe it's my defense against growing up. If I'm still in college I can't be a REAL grown up right? (I guess not, since my daddy's not paying any more, but hush). I REALLY hate having homework ALL the time and I hate writing papers, but at the same time I really do value education and I love learning. And for the FIRST TIME I am getting a degree in something I LOVE learning about.

I am also training for a half marathon in November. HALF! I decided since I gained half the baby weight with Lyla then as a reward, I only have to train for HALF a marathon. Of course, right now, even 13.2 sounds way too far!

So lots to do! And of course, I have two kids under three, a house to sell, a house to buy, a house to move out of, one to move into, a job to start, a new course to develop for fall, a husband to clean up after and I'd like to have a little fun. Listing it all out kinda makes me think "If I can do all this, won't I be like super woman?" I think so!

I like accomplishing things that feel impossible. And right now a LOT of things feel that way. Selling a house alone can feel that way. But we will do it.

I found a few other quotes that have helped me out:

My philosophy of life is that if we make up our mind what we are going to make of our lives, then work hard toward that goal, we never lose - somehow we win out. Ronald Reagan

Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become.

But my FAVORITE is:

When you dance, your purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor. It's to enjoy each step along the way. Wayne Dyer

I'll go do something more productive now. While hoping my husbands boss lets him work for a while longer. Otherwise, we will be heading home this weekend.... Anyone want company... :)

One month and four days

That is a long time in between posts... My bad...

Well, we've had lots going on around here. Most I can't blog about just yet, so I'll stick with what I can talk about.

Lyla is GROWING! We went home in June for almost two weeks and since we got home, she seems to not be fitting into anything any longer. Or if she does, she looks HUGE! Lyla is smiling and getting into her crawl stance quiet well. She eats like clockwork and sleeps 11-12 hours each night and for at least an hour every three hours during the day. She rules. Just like her brother.

Speaking of, Carson is getting FUUUNNNYYY. I think I've said that before. But he is. Most things shouldn't be funny, like when he says, "No way Mama, No way." But when he says, "Yes mam Mama, Yes mam", that makes up for it. He is learning how to tell us what he does and does NOT want/like/whatever, and most things that he does on his own are either "perfect" or "good enough". He likes to demonstrate how things are done, for example, you ask if he went swimming, he says, "Yes! Like this" and then he will lay down and show you HOW he swims. Yesterday, Carson slept till NOON! It was cool, except he was still so fussy he went back to bed at 6:30pm and slept till we woke him at 7:30 today, but don't worry, he asked to go "night night" by noon.

Anyway, just a quick update to check in. More to come soon...

There's a whole lotta poopin goin on...

So I seem to blog about poop quiet often. In fact one time, the "Crap Blog Detector" commented on my blog, he said I must be "terribly dull to have to blog about poop", while I agree, my first thought was "WELL, you are the CRAP blog detector" I was honestly momentarily confused that someone may just like blogs about crap. If you are new to my blog, here is the link to the first poop blog:

www.kendallandjosh.blogspot.com/2009/11/battle-of-flying-poop.html

Anyway, yes. I blog about poop. But my life involves a LOT of it. One day, Lyla pooped in THREE clean diapers in a ROW! We'd change her, pick her up, she'd poop, we'd change her, pick her up, poop, we'd change her...you get the picture. And really, this is my life most mornings, she only likes to keep a clean diaper for oh, two minutes...Jaxon poops all over my yard, which results in me cleaning poop off the bottom of shoes and picking it up out of my yard. Carson poops a lot also. I'm pretty sure I found some dried up on my wall the other day. That's just nasty. And these days Carson is totally preferring to poop in the potty. Which leads me to my first story.

I left Josh alone during bath and bedtime the other day to go get my hair done. I was pretty worried, but Josh assured me he was fine. "Ok", I thought, "he is the dad"... So I left. And only checked in once, and J said it was all going fine and to enjoy myself. When I got home I got the REAL story.

Like I said, C likes to go in the potty to poo. So he told Josh that he had to go poo. Josh, who was holding a screaming Lyla, said "ok buddy, let me put Lyla down", but when he turned around, Carson had already began. Well, apparently, Josh didn't CONFIRM what C meant when he said "go poo poo". I know that means two things, one, "I want to go poo poo", two "I just went in my pants." Unfortunately for Josh, C meant number two. Josh walked into the bathroom to find Carson climbing onto the potty streaming the poo, that WAS in his pants, all over the toilet. Carson was also in the process of "wiping" which meant poo was on his hands also. SO. Josh grabed him up and just guess what he did! He put him in MY BATHTUB!!!! And apparently, there was some left over poop on his bottom that fell out IN MY BATHTUB! BTW, Lyla is still screaming through all of this and was brought into the bathroom and put in her boppy to witness. There was more to this story, but I think I stopped listening when I started imaging poop IN MY BATHTUB.

But Carson DOES go poo in the potty quiet a bit. And when he does, we sing a little song, "Carson poo pooed in the potty, poo poo in the potty, YEA Carson!" Well, the singing of this little song leads to my next story.

Josh took Carson into a bathroom at a gas station. J walked in to find the urinal (spelling? I have never tried to spell that word before) taken up by two large truckers. So Josh leads Carson into the stall. He doesn't bother shutting the door, I guess cause guys just go in front of each other, gross. Anyway, Josh asks Carson to stand back and to not touch anything. Josh continues to go pee- NO NOT POO! About half way through J's potty break, he hears "YEA DADDY! Pee pee in the potty! Pee pee in the potty! Yea Daddy!" And of course, he also hears the truckers, laughing and mocking "yea Daddy! Pee pee in the potty!" Of course, Josh misses the potty b/c he is laughing so hard at the whole scene. FUNNY!

SO, poop, I feel is QUIET entertaining Mr. Crap Blog Detector.

Modern %#*&@# Technology

So we have fell victim to modern technology with our new baby. When buying a monitor this time, we actually researched and ended up getting one that detects movements. Now, when I first read this, I read it as "alerts you when baby moves". And I was like, "Come on! I don't need to be alerted every time she MOVES!" But then Josh corrected me and told me that it monitors babies movement and alerts me when she doesn't move for 20 seconds. Sounds good right? I debated between this and video monitor and decided that I'd rather be alerted if she stops breathing than look at her while she sleeps.

We moved Lyla out of our room last week and got the monitor all set up. Of course, we had to have some test runs. We figured we would test it out by taking the baby out of her bed and if it goes off then were happy. So we did, and sure enough, all kinds of alarms started going off every where. NOTE: if you are going to fall victim to modern technology, make sure you are smart enough to work it. Josh and I scrambled back and forth between monitors, the receiver, pushing buttons like crazy, just to turn the thing off. We finally get it off and rather than being content, I decide we should test it again... NOW, mind you, I barely even USED a monitor with Carson... Anyway, again we layed her down and again we picked her up and again alerts went off every where that we could not control. "Ok. I think it works" I said.

That night I went to bed assured that if my baby stopped breathing I would be alerted... ALL OVER THE HOUSE! So I slept. And around 2am, Lyla woke up. I went to get her, got her out of her bed, began to change her diaper, when all those &*#@* alarms started going off again!!! My thoughts as I scrambled around trying to shut the thing off were something like this: "She's not MOVING b/c she's with ME! Can't this *&$#@!$ monitor figure that out??? Isn't there a $#@&*# WEIGHT sensor too!"

After I succeeded in waking up the house I fed her and put her down and went back to sleep. Only to be awaken by that #*@&# monitor. I picked it up and hit it against my bed before I realized "Oh &(#@^$ that means she's not breathing" (by the way, this monitor makes me cuss in my mind a lot). SO, I finally clued in to what was going on and rushed to her room. It was dark, so I couldn't really tell if she was breathing, so of course to be safe I shake her awake. Yep. If she wasn't breathing, she after that! I just hope we have no shaken baby issues to deal with.

Unsettled and AWAKE I went back to bed wondering if she was breathing or not, but decided it didn't matter b/c that thing was going to wake me up!

We slept peacefully for several nights after, then last night I was woken up by the *&^$# alarm again. But this time I was prepared, I jumped out of bed SO FAST, throwing the monitor at Josh to turn off, ran to her room, but this time DID have enough sense to just look and touch first, and she was sleeping like a baby. With my heart beating out of my chest, I then realized that I may had just ripped my stitches out of my incision b/c my tummy when I shot up and ran, which had already been sore from not following Dr's orders. I curled over and fell back on the bed about the time Josh came it. "She's breathing" I told him. "That %^#&@* monitor just made me rip my #*#$& stitches" I THOUGHT (yes, just THOUGHT). "I'll turn the sensitivity up on the thing" Josh said. "WHAT?? The *#%@*# sensitivity was DOWN???" I THOUGHT. "Good idea," I SAID and returned to bed.

NOTE: If it hadn't been for that #%$*@# monitor, I would have only been up once between 9:30pm and 7am...

Lyla I Love...

Lyla I love...
that you snuggle up in our neck to get comfy
that you look so much like your brother that I call you Carson on accident
the way you hold your sweet hands together up to your face
that you suck on your finger when you are hungry
that you peck on my cheek if you're real hungry
that you smile sweetly in your sleep
that you make your brother so happy
the way you cuddle on your daddy's chest
that your name fits you so well
that you have the tiniest feet I've ever seen
that you have brought us so much happiness...


I have been trying to memorize so many things about you this past month. The way you smell, the way your soft hair feels on my face, the way your little body fits on my chest, the way you hold my finger while you sleep, the way your little lips feel on my cheek, the way you need me to hold you so you can sleep comfortably, the way you squeak in your sleep, all because I know now how fast it will pass. Soon enough you will have real hair, not fit on my chest, feed yourself and only be cozy in a bed to sleep. You won't need me because you will be strong and independent. I pray that is how you grow to be.

So for now, I will continue to try to freeze moments in my memory- even 2am moments and continue to remind myself in my exhaustion that it will end soon, too soon, restful nights also include a grown baby. Our last baby. Lyla, I love.

Um who are you???

SO, I don't really have a lot of updating to do this week. Lyla is still a baby, still eating, crying, sleeping. You know, the norm. Carson is still 2.... BUT does seem to be coming out of his "Demon Phase". He really started responding in a VERY negative way about a month before Lyla was born. He started hitting at school, not minding, pushing, crying about everything, in fact, he wouldn't even smile in the morning when I would come up to get him. It has been awful!!! But the last week or so he has shown signs of the old Carson, and today when I took him to school, he didn't need to be held or convinced to stay, he just started playing and told me bye. He didn't need me at all!!! Just how I like him to be!!! Secure and happy.

Since that is about all the updates I have I thought I'd share my "SAY WHAT???" moment of the week...

So, my MIL, Kathy, kept L while C was in school on Monday so I could run to the store in peace. When I was checking out the cashier decided to make small talk. Which is fine with me. I'm from Seminole. I'm used to having a long conversation with strangers who work everywhere. Anyway, I was buying kid products, so she asked how my mothers day was. I said, "Great! We took our kids to an Astro's game" (which is baseball...and yes, it does sound like more of a FATHERS Day, but oh well...)She asked how old my kids were and I told her, 2 and 3 weeks. She then continued to tell me that 3 weeks is to young for that and asked why I wasn't worried. I told her "I didn't know what there was to worry about... It was indoors, and she can sleep on me in my sling as good as she can sleep any where. Besides", I told her, "I don't think my 2 year old and I should have to miss out on new experiences just because I decided to have another baby." She said, "True. But that's too young".

Needless to say I left there wondering who that cashier at HEB thinks she is dishing out advice...I guess that's what got her..never mind- that's too mean to type...

Just a side note- Lyla was awake and in awe most of the game. I believe she loved it as much as a three week old can love anything...

OK. So, agree with her if you want. That is fine. But we did the same thing with Carson and he is fine. But no matter how you feel about taking a baby in public securely attached to your body, I don't feel that it is EVER a strangers job to correct someones parenting style unless asked.

This experience almost outranks the time a complete stranger started wiping the spit up off Carson's mouth...with her HANDS!!!...during flu season...

So that's the end of the weeks update...hopefully a less irritated post will come next Wednesday.