Not So Potty Trained

So, Lyla will be three in TWO MONTHS and she has only peed in a potty ONE time.  SERIOUSLY.  EVER!  I am oh so over changing diapers.  We have the following conversation daily:
Me: Lyla, do you know where you are suppossed to go pee pee?
L: In the POBBY!
Me: Right, so can we do that today?
L: I probise! (she can't say M's or T's or K's. She says monkey's like Mompmees.)

She will sit on the potty, say all done, stand up and wipe and every time, NOTHING comes out.  It is SO irritating!

So everyone says, "don't push it, she will do it when she's ready" and I'm like "ok, but what if I'm so ready that I'm about to boycott poopy butts?" 

Yesterday, we were having our daily converstation about the potty and it went a little differently...
Me: Lyla, why don't you try to go to the potty before we put on your pull up?
L: I don't want to pee pee in the 'pobby'. 
Me: Lyla, you have until spring break and you are going to start going pee pee in the potty b/c I'm cutting you off.
And do you know what she did???? She turned her head away from me and closed her eyes as if she couldnt HEAR ME.  Seriously. WHAT?

Sometimes she will "go pee" and stand up, look in and say, "I see someshing! Someshing yeyow" (guess she can't say th's or l's either) So I run in clapping and cheering annnnnnd NOTHIN.  Not one single drop of pee. 

A few months ago I tried to cold turkey method.  You know the one where you just put them in underwear and put them on the potty every half hour or whatever?  Well, for us it went like this.

C: Lyla it's potty breaking time! (b/c the alarm went off)
L: (sits on potty- stands up) ALL DONE!
Me: Nothing is in there.

TWO MINUTES LATER...

L: Mom!  I'm all wet. Now I get NEW princess panties.

Seriously, it's like she would pee in them just so she could wear new ones!  I'd put new ones on and she'd skip off saying "don't pee pee on the princess."  And of course, a couple hours later we were changing them again. 

Oh!  And you know the ONE time she pee'd in the potty?  Well, it was b/c I put the potty in front of the TV and sat her on it with juice then sat by her for TWO HOURS until she just happened to pee.....

Spring break Lyla Kade.  Bring it on.