Yesterday was the first day of spring and like everyday I have had lately, it was absolutely great. Today, the second day of spring, came the day I've been waiting for since June 15th- my house in Katy is officially sold. Whew. I didn't even realize the amount of relief I would feel today, because I had already gotten used to the fact that it was sold, but CLOSING on it, what a RELIEF.
So now we can start fresh. We have so many wonderful things coming to life around us. Trees we've never seen in our yard blooming, flowers we didn't know were planted sprouting up, our sweet baby Lyla is coming into her own sweet, playful personality more each day and will turn 1 in just a few short weeks. As sad as this is, we get to have two "kids" now. All the fun things in life can begin.
For the first time, pretty much in my whole life, I feel so content. I am content, thankful and honestly LOVING everything I am doing and trying to do in life. Are their frustrations and stress that come along with being so behind financially? Sure. Does my three year old make me want to pull all my hair out at times? OF COURSE. Am I still waiting on my husband to organize the garage? Well duh. Am I fighting back the tears about Lyla no longer being a baby. Yes. But I am SO happy. And SO content. And so THANKFUL.
I finally feel reassured that the decision to come back was right. Josh is loving his job, my kids are loving school, the house sold, I love my new home, getting involved in town and in a church, Carson started soccer, getting to go down to the lake. Life is good. And I'm just so excited for the rest of it.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
To my husband: Half a decade
When you say it like that, 5 years REALLY seems like a long time. I wonder how it has gone by so fast... Just five short years ago I was soaking up the sun in Jamaica with my new husband. Nice and clean and tan. Today, five short years later, I am still in my PJ's (at 3pm), I'm white and in Oklahoma on a sunless day, listening to my TWO kids play together in the living room. The fourth living room we've shared since we married. Five short years ago.
Most days I still look at you slightly confused and think, "I MARRIED JOSH ROGERS? That doesn't seem like me at all." You know this. Knowing so much of each other for so long does make for occasional confusion when we really think about how far we have come. Josh and Kendall- Dwighties, drinking buddies, youth directors, Oil and Gas peeps, INSURANCE ADJUSTOR'S, college instructors, PARENTS of TWO... maybe someone should have cut us off a while back...
I LOVE that after 5 years of marriage, that we still call each other the minute we get off work, or when we are driving some where in two different cars. It's great to me that we still want to talk as much as possible. I love that we think EVERY night is important enough to spend together and when we can't- even if we are looking forward to "me" time- we get kinda sad that we will miss a night with just us. Even though, 98% of those nights consist of nothing more than episodes of House,Greys, or Idol and a glass of wine (if we are feelin crazy) I still LOVE that we make it a priority. A priority to be together.
The last two years have by far been the hardest of our 5 years. Changing jobs twice, moving twice, having two mortgages, adding another child. Lots and lots of prayer, concern, doubts, challenges, tears- but here we are. Ten days away from closing on one house- two weeks from closing for the second time on our new one- we lost well over $30,000 and we feel stronger not older, happier not more stressed. We still have a million unknowns but we wake up everyday excited and go to bed knowing we can conquer any challenges.
I was amazed this last 10 months at how little we fought. I was braced for impact. Knowing how poorly we verbalize our feelings at times. But we just focused. We focused on what we want, why we made the change and on how great it will be when the hard times pass. I am proud of our relationship for that. I am proud of the man you have become- the father you have become- the husband you have become. I am proud of the sacrifices you have made for our family. I am proud that you have thought hard and prayed hard and headed in a direction that you feel will be better for our children and our relationship. I wish you would clean out the garage more- but I am still proud of you.
And as I sit today in sunless and cold Oklahoma rather than the beaches of Mexico, I am more than ever reminded of the sacrifice we made. And as I listen to our kids laugh, think about the quick visit from my dad today and clean our new home, I am thankful. I am not tan. But I am thankful. For you. For our kids. And the new life we built. And most of all, I am thankful I was smart enough to marry you. ;)
Most days I still look at you slightly confused and think, "I MARRIED JOSH ROGERS? That doesn't seem like me at all." You know this. Knowing so much of each other for so long does make for occasional confusion when we really think about how far we have come. Josh and Kendall- Dwighties, drinking buddies, youth directors, Oil and Gas peeps, INSURANCE ADJUSTOR'S, college instructors, PARENTS of TWO... maybe someone should have cut us off a while back...
I LOVE that after 5 years of marriage, that we still call each other the minute we get off work, or when we are driving some where in two different cars. It's great to me that we still want to talk as much as possible. I love that we think EVERY night is important enough to spend together and when we can't- even if we are looking forward to "me" time- we get kinda sad that we will miss a night with just us. Even though, 98% of those nights consist of nothing more than episodes of House,Greys, or Idol and a glass of wine (if we are feelin crazy) I still LOVE that we make it a priority. A priority to be together.
The last two years have by far been the hardest of our 5 years. Changing jobs twice, moving twice, having two mortgages, adding another child. Lots and lots of prayer, concern, doubts, challenges, tears- but here we are. Ten days away from closing on one house- two weeks from closing for the second time on our new one- we lost well over $30,000 and we feel stronger not older, happier not more stressed. We still have a million unknowns but we wake up everyday excited and go to bed knowing we can conquer any challenges.
I was amazed this last 10 months at how little we fought. I was braced for impact. Knowing how poorly we verbalize our feelings at times. But we just focused. We focused on what we want, why we made the change and on how great it will be when the hard times pass. I am proud of our relationship for that. I am proud of the man you have become- the father you have become- the husband you have become. I am proud of the sacrifices you have made for our family. I am proud that you have thought hard and prayed hard and headed in a direction that you feel will be better for our children and our relationship. I wish you would clean out the garage more- but I am still proud of you.
And as I sit today in sunless and cold Oklahoma rather than the beaches of Mexico, I am more than ever reminded of the sacrifice we made. And as I listen to our kids laugh, think about the quick visit from my dad today and clean our new home, I am thankful. I am not tan. But I am thankful. For you. For our kids. And the new life we built. And most of all, I am thankful I was smart enough to marry you. ;)
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