Say WHAT???

I have had this reaction to several things this week...

First, Monday was my first day on my own. And of course, I didn't get to just get up and enjoy my morning, I had to get up and get two kids fed, dressed, Carson's lunch packed, myself dressed and out the door by 8:30 for C to get to school on time. And did I mention it was the morning after Lyla had her first hard night? Of COURSE! Anyway, we managed, with 20 minutes to spare! Say what?

Monday also included Lyla's two(ish) week check up. And she is doing great! She was down to 6.6 the Monday before but this Monday she was back up to 7lb even. Guess she really is getting what she needs, even when she sleeps a long time at night.

Then came Tuesday... I had survived my first day alone with two and a still somewhat sore c-section incision, then I got to find out that I would be following my first day alone with my first NIGHT alone. It's now Wednesday and I haven't seen Josh really since Monday night since I was dead to the world when he tried to tell me bye Tuesday. Say what???

Tuesday also included my incision check in the Medical district. Since I can't carry Lyla in her carrier and Carson didn't have school, I was really wondering how I was gonna do this without any restraints... But my friend Aubrey saved the day when she said she would come stay with Carson. YEA! THANK YOU AUBREY! Taking Lyla alone was a breeze. Stuck her in my sling and she slept through the whole appointment. Getting taken on and off and everything.

Then the BIGGEST "SAY WHAT" news came... I had to weigh at my appointment and I have lost all my pregnancy weight plus a pound!!!! And I haven't even stopped eating like I'm pregnant yet. Now those of you who know me well know why I'm SO excited. You all know I had to train for and run a whole marathon to get C's weight off. Sixteen MONTHS and 26.2 later, it was gone. But this time I just breast fed. And exercised throughout. And it just came off. By day 11!!! SAY WHAT????

Now, does my lower stomach look good? Well, NO, still swollen and sagging, but I'll work on that later!

One week down!

Well, it's been a week since Lyla arrived. And I just can't begin to describe the difference between this time and last. First off, I have showered EVERY day. And have even been fixing my hair! WHAT??? I'm not sure I even did that before she was born. Last time I think Carson stopped crying long enough for me to get ONE shower in on day FIVE and there was defiantly no hair fixing or make up involved! In fact, I have even painted my finger nails!!! I don't think I have done that for years! I have been getting about 8 hours of sleep EVERY night, last time I think I got 8 hours in the first week combined. My kids nap at the same time so I get 2.5-3 hours of peace every afternoon, last time if C napped this early it was because I was holding him. I am nursing successfully, last time I gave up on day three. Pretty much opposite, like everyone said. It's just that everyone also said Carson was an easy baby. Didn't think it would get EASIER. I am just SO blessed.

However, I was hoping for a week "off" from normal household duties, but Josh's clients didn't really get the memo that he was out for the week so he has been having to work a LOT and I have been taking care of most things still. BOO! Can't a girl get a break after 9 months of misery? LOL! Oh well, Josh has been helping when he can and has been a big help with Carson, which is most important.

Josh has been FANTASTIC at night. He has been getting up every feeding (all of TWO each night) to change her diapers, and to bring her to me and to help me to get situated. Last night he even set up and watched some TV with me, after all, Lyla only woke us up ONCE last night, at 4:30am, so we were really pretty rested. Lyla and I then slept till almost 9. NINE!!!!!!! WHAT?????? WHO IS THIS KID???? I hope she's not autistic. (always my concern any time my kids are too good).

By the way, I meant to say diaperS, because if there is one thing this baby has down it is bad timing. I swear she only likes to poop in a fresh diaper. One night, Josh changed three in a row. We were laughing like crazy. Well, the best laugh I could produce anyway.

Again, I just feel so blessed. For such a sweet baby, for a healthy baby, for Carson who is adjusting well and who LOVES his baby sister SO much and for my husband who is working overtime right now to take care of us in every way he can. And for friends who have been bringing meals to make sure we are eating. What a great beginning to this new adventure!

Cautiously bragging

Ever since I began telling people that I was having a second baby, I have heard "you know your second won't be as easy as Carson was right?" I have told these people, that I was sure they were right, but that I couldn't listen to them and feel good about my decision at the same time. So, in the back of my mind I have been fearing the wrath of the second child. Especially the first night home. You see, I couldn't imagine having a worse first night than I did with Carson. We cried ALL NIGHT LONG. He would NOT eat, sleep or even lay in my arms without screaming. In fact, the only one sleeping that night, was Josh. Who slept through it all. He said he was tired from staying in the hospital.............. you can imagine the dialogue that went through my head about THAT that night.......

Anyway, we came home from the hospital yesterday (a day early YEAH!) and I began bracing myself for the worst. Of course, I was more prepared. Josh had not been allowed to stay at the hospital this time, he was to be rested. We also had an agreement about each of our roles at night. So I was ready. Braced for impact. Ready for the devil to be released in my baby that was as sweet as an angel in the hospital.

But it never happened. She ate off and on from 6pm till 10pm and then went to bed. In her pack-n-play. Josh set the alarm to get her up in three hours, so he did. He changed her and brought her to me. And she ate for about 1 minute, then fell back asleep. So Josh got back up and put her back in bed. Three hours later, we repeated the same routine, and she fell asleep again. So we put her back down. Then at SIX AM she actually woke up. Josh got her, changed her and brought her to me. She ate. And she ate well. She then fell asleep so Josh put her back down. No crying. No fussing. And no thoughts of divorce.

Now, I'm still bracing myself for impact. I mean, everyone thought Carson was such an easy baby and told me that Lyla would be so much harder. But at the moment, I can't help but to think, "HA HA! TOLD YA SO! I KNEW I COULD HAVE TWO EASY BABIES!"

Now, since I said that, I do swear to admit when my sweet baby girl becomes possessed by the baby demons. But for now, I'm just thankful for a good first night home and for the fact that I am a well rested mom of a new baby!!!!!!!

Lyla's Birthday

I can't believe Lyla Kade is here. Each day of the last 9 months have gone by so slow and now we are going on the 4th day with our newest family member. So, how'd she get here? Let me tell you...

Everything worked out like I had planned. Thursday night Josh, Carson, my dad and I packed up and headed to the Hilton in the Medical District to spend the night, Carson had a slumber party with my dad and Josh and I attempted to go to sleep early... OF COURSE THAT DIDN'T WORK! I would have thought that I would have been more relaxed second time around. Seeing how I knew what to expect. But I guess sometimes ignorance is bliss because KNOWING what to expect the next day only resulted in me walking myself through everything that would happen over and over again in my mind. I also found myself VERY sad about my "lasts" with just Carson. So between my nerves and my sadness, sleep Thursday night didn't really exist. For either of us. So at 5am, Josh and I headed out on foot to St. Lukes to begin the day, dead tired.

Prep for surgery went quickly and the next thing I knew I was walking myself into the OR, hoping up on the table to get my epidural, and trying not to puke on myself while I laid on my back waiting on Josh to join me.

As I was laying on the table, taking deep breaths, and waiting for J, I found myself straight up scared. A feeling I don't feel very often. I KNEW I wouldn't feel anything, it wasn't a fear of pain, I just didn't like the idea of being cut open while being awake. My first c-section I was SO tired after 14 hours of labor that I didn't really care what they did to me. I couldn't even lift up my own hand. This time, I was TOTALLY aware of everything around me and it scared me. Josh finally came into the room and they got started. Josh tried to talk to me, but I found myself feeling better just having him hold my hand and closing my eyes trying to relax, while ignoring the things I'd hear like, "move the bladder there" and "NO! Not like that!". Quickly enough the baby was taken out, or shaken out I guess I should say. The doctor showed me the baby all covered in goo and quickly took her away to wrap her up. I then started hearing other things I didn't like.

I was told I would be getting the baby almost immediately. And when she wasn't handed over I started to worry. Of course, what was I gonna do? My bladder was over "there" remember? As I laid there I could hear Lyla crying and it sounded strange. Josh went to take pictures. While he was gone, someone came up to me to tell me that they, Josh, Lyla and the nurses, went to get the excess fluid out of her lungs. The nurse didn't seem worried, so I relaxed. And soon enough Lyla was in my arms.



After what seemed like forever, (or an hour, whatever) Josh, Lyla and I were rolled into the recovery room. It was great. Last time, I was left behind as Josh got to introduce Lyla to everyone. But this time, we all got to go through it together. My dad and Carson were able to come on into the recover rooom, so I got to introduce C to his sister quickly. And instantly all my fears about having a second were calmed. Carson just LOVED her. He wanted to kiss her and hug her right away.



Right when Carson was ready to go for a walk, Kathy, Josh's mom arrived and we got to introduce Lyla to her. Again, exactly like planned.

Lyla's exam was continued with us present and we were told she was 7 pounds 2 ounces and 19 1/4 inches long. She was born at 8:01am. And everything was looking great!

Around 11am we were taken into our room and we continued the day getting checked by a million different people, napping, eating and just enjoying the fact that the day went so smooth, that we were all healthy and that I remembered it all! YEA!

After months of doubt and second guessing everything from having a second to having a c-section again, to having a GIRL, I can't imagine things going better. It has been the most beautiful , calm and peaceful experience ever. So, welcome Lyla Kade. You have already made our world brighter and more complete.

This is it

I don't have much time today but I wanted to weigh in on some thoughts as I am beginning my LAST day of pregnancy....

First, it's strange to know that a big moment in life like pregnancy will have passed by tomorrow at this time. So strange that I am growing up so fast... You spend your whole life, if you are a girl, knowing that SOMEDAY you'll be pregnant- you may even spend half that life hoping that you don't GET pregnant- and then one day that time is over. It's just strange...

I am also feeling a sense of RELIEF!!! I really don't like being pregnant. I don't feel the connection with my babies while in the womb as much as others- instead I feel like I am growing a tumor that makes me sick and miserable. Luckily, that changes once the baby comes...

I am sad that it won't just be the three of us. But am calming my thoughts on that matter by remembering the fact that I have NEVER heard anyone say "Man, wish I hadn't have had my second kid" and by focusing on all the joy Carson has brought us and knowing that Lyla will do the same. AND on the idea of seeing Carson as an older brother. How neat will that be? I can't wait.

I am nervous about the c-section. More so than last time b/c I was too tired after 14 hours of labor to care much. I just wanted to meet Carson. But, strangely and more calm about the WHOLE experience b/c at least I know what to expect. Maybe calm isn't the word, but prepared.

I am also finding myself sad about that fact that I may never again hear Josh say at 6pm "Go ahead and relax! I'll take care of everything!" And by the fact that I'll probably get told no when I wake Josh up at midnight for a bowl of cereal. And that I won't eat a chunk of chocolate cake without guilt again. Or take naps daily if I want and NOT feel like I'm being lazy. You know, all that "special treatment" you get while pregnant- well that will be out the window! Oh well, I don't accept help well anyway~

BUT, I will get to run again!!!! I will get to have C jump into my lap w/o having to worry about elbows in the tummy (in a few weeks anyway). I will get to bend over and shave my legs w/o pain or doing to blind. I will SLOWLY get to feel like myself all while knowing that my family is finished being made. We can begin our new life as a complete family of four.

ALMOST

Carson has a very cute way of saying almost, it sounds like "ALLLLL most". And he says it ANY time something was a close call. And I couldn't help but saying this in my head yesterday as I was leaving the hospital. Yes leaving. Let me start from the beginning.....

First, my WONDERFUL husband gave me a birthday surprise that only was surpassed by my first car when I was still 15, my best friend Tracy. Wait wait wait, I'll back up...AGAIN...

Wednesday night he told me he had to have dinner with a client. And of course, me being a trusting wife never doubted him. Well, until I noticed him making facebook comments... I was a little confused why he was on FB when he should have been WORKING, but I let it slide, after I texted (TEXT ED?? is that how we say the past tense??) him about it and he claimed the clients were late. So once again I believed. When Josh did get home, he was VERY excited to watch American Idol. I was already in bed in my t-shirt, so I asked him if we could watch it in the bedroom. He kinda jumped up and down and clapped his hands a little and said "NO! Let's watch it in here!" I just thought, "WOW! He is REALLY excited about Idol...Loser." So I literally pulled myself out of bed and went to the living room to find Josh insisting the dog go out. I told Josh I had already let him in for the night, but Josh AGAIN insisted he be let out any way. "Whatever" I thought. THEN someone knocked on my door. First off. I don't really answer my door here. I don't know anyone that comes over. And I certainly don't answer my door without pants OR a bra on. But Josh insisted. Again, I thought, "Whatever" and wrapped a blanket around my waist and went to the door. I opened the door and who popped out? Tracy Dowell.

Well, my reaction was VERY UN-Kendall like. I pretty much started shaking, sweating and crying, while explaining to both of them that it's not nice to surprise a tired, lonely pregnant lady. Then I looked at Josh and thought, "Great. Now he's gonna know how easy it'll be to cheat on me..."

So, that's how my 30th b-day weekend began. Tra and I spent the next few days just hanging out, since we still had to keep C while J worked. We also walked. A lot. Tracy was pretty determined for me to have Lyla while she was here. So we shopped, took walks, shopped and walked.

Friday night Josh had even more surprised. He had told me that we were going to my friend Amanda's house for dinner for my b-day. Of course, he only told me this AFTER I had found an email from Amanda to Josh... OH, and did I mention, Josh flew Tracy down and the day before I found where the money had been spent and thought someone had stolen our credit????

SO. We went to Amanda's for dinner and I saw my friend T-Jay's SUV. I thought, "Well, Josh may have invited T-Jay. After all, he invited TRACY". When we went in I was surprised by not only T-Jay, but our whole small group and all the kiddo's. Josh had ordered fajitas (oh did I mention I walked up on him making those plans while out to dinner one night?) he had brought margarita's, Amanda and T-Jay and Aubrey had made a cake, decorated and brought sides. And while I was VERY surprised, I am proud to say that I did NOT react so, you know, pregnant like... We all enjoyed dinner, drinks, cakes, kids and then headed home about the time we woulda gone out ten years ago. And it was perfect. Tracy had made me walk so much I was ready to sit. So, thank you to all of you who helped out and made turning 30 while giant and miserable a great experience!

Ok, ok. Let me get to the real embarrassing stuff. On Saturday, Tracy and I got to have a "Kendall and Tracy Day". Josh took Carson with some friends to play Frisbee golf and for BBQ and had tickets to the Astro's game for that night. Tracy and I shopped, of course, got pedicures (THANK YOU T!!), had lunch AND got to have a LOT of contractions. Beginning at 1pm, my contractions went from every 20 minutes to every 8 minutes by 3:15 (T took notes, so I may be wrong...) ANYWAY, these 8 minute contractions lasted for several hours, so we called the nurse. Because I am having a VBAC (if I have her before Friday) my doctor said she doesn't want me to labor long at home. And I live about 45 minutes away. So, nurse says come to the hospital. Which, by the way, we found the location of on Wednesday... Since we knew where we were going we loaded the car up and headed into Houston. My contractions getting worse the whole time. When we arrived Josh dropped Tracy and I off at the front door.

I was still saying to everyone that I didn't think this was real labor because Lyla would NOT be so convenient. I mean it was DAY TIME. Josh was off work, Tracy was there to help with Carson, I had slept good the night before. In other words, everything was way off. But back to the hospital...

Tracy and I walked in and I realized I really should have taken one of those hospital tours. All I knew was purple elevators to the third floor. And since the elevators weren't lined up in rainbow order, we had to ask where they were. We found those, pushed three, only to get off and see NO signs for labor and delivery. But we did find a hospital employee leaving a closet, so we asked and we were directed. We roamed around till we finally found where we needed to be. I WAS however, preregistered. I did THAT Wednesday also. PREPARED. (yeah right) So we get into the evaluation room and as the nurse was preparing to hook up the monitor, I had my last contraction of the day... ALLLLL most.

While they monitored me I had to fill out a TON of paperwork, that apparently will have to be done again when I come back. However, I told my doctor that I won't be coming back before Friday unless my water breaks or I can feel the baby's head...And I asked the nurses and resident on call if they wanted to save some time and just go ahead with the c-section, but I guess that's not how things work. So we left. No ballgame for Carson, no baby for Tracy, and I learned that even if you are having regular contractions that hurt, you don't have to go to the hospital because your body may STILL be doing nothing... ALLLLL most.

Today we sent Tracy home on a jet plane, went to small group, cleaned the house so the house cleaner can come, and we began to wait. Most likely till Friday. Because while "natural induction" techniques like walking don't get a baby out, knives DO.