For the second time I ventured out on my own with two kids to my least place on the planet, Walmart. It started off ok, I got my lists all ready to go, my bills paid so that I knew what I was to spend, I got the kids dressed, coats on, one loaded in the carseat, convinced C to pee, grabbed everyone and headed out the door, only to find my husband still had the carseat in his car. DANG!
Call to husband requesting permission to leave the house.
Josh shows up pretty quick, got us all fixed up and off we went. Got to Walmart, found a spot about 2 miles from the door and headed in. I strained (due to my back barely holding on the last few days) to get Lyla's carrier up into the seat part, and Carson jumped on the front to ride. We got to the back of the store, where I like to start, and of COURSE, "Mom, I have to pee". REALLY? REALLY? "Can you hold it?" "Yes." "Good".
First part of shopping was really ok, except for having to go back to the baby section 3 times to get all I needed for two weeks. About half way in Lyla started fussing, but don't worry! I brough Mum Mums. So I gave her one and she was content. But then I started having to really work to keep C under control. Since Walmart isn't as smart as HEB and doesn't provide DOUBLE seats, C has to walk. Well, walking between me and the cart got old, so off he went. Let's just say, I'm pretty sure everyone in the store knew his name...And, I am sorry to any mother I gave a bad look to when I almost ran over their kids, not all of you, some of you don't try, but I'm sorry to the ones who do.
By the time we got to the last leg all hell had broke loose. Lyla started screaming. I gave her the last Mum Mum. Carson started eatting the fruit. FROM THE SHELVES. So, I started collecting the fruit he had taken bites out of to buy. It was about then when Lyla started choking on a MUM MUM.. REALLY!!! I thought the reason they are so nasty was bc they were like AIR and they couldn't choke. I dug it out of her throat, which did NOT help the crying. Finished getting groceries and headed to check out. Well, of COURSE there are at least 4 people in all 3-4 open lines by the food, so I head towards the other side, along the way, Carson got distracted and fell behind, I noticed luckily b/c I hear a guy say "Hurry up Carson, you're getting left." No I did not know him. Like I said, the whole store knew his name by that point.
I found a line, grabbed some Goldfish and handed to C to eat on. Lyla was still SCREAMING. I tried to play with her to get her calmed down, it worked, but then it was FINALLY my turn to check out. So of course, I had to unload all my groceries. And, of course I also had to RELOAD all my groceries. (NOPE. Walmart does NOT have baggers, HEB go-ers.) Lyla was acting as if she might DIE if she had to sit any longer, so I took her out of the carrier to continue loading bags. While I was attempting to fit everything back into the cart that I took out of it, which I can never do, I hear a scream, I mean ANOTHER scream, this time it was from C. He had stuck his fingers on the turn about thing that Walmart keeps their bags on and got them smashed. Great. So, now, I'm calming a baby, kissing fingers on a hysterical two year old, my groceries aren't fitting in the cart, so the cashier is rearranging, while trying to get C to let her see his fingers, but of course he won't, so he's clinging onto my leg because the lady won't let him go, really? I know she was trying to be nice, but LEAVE HIM ALONE. He then starts screaming for me to hold him b/c he got scared of the lady who wouldn't let him go. Possibly due to the fact that I had been telling him the whole way through the store that he had to stay close b/c I didn't want anyone to get him....... So I put L back in her carrier, strapped her in, picked up C and attempted to push my completly over filled cart out with one hand. The cashier asked how close I was parked, "about two miles out" I replied. I thanked her, appoligized to the lady behind me and took off. Cussing Walmart in my mind for not having guys to push your cart out for you.
Yes, I had to carry C all the way to the car. "Carson is done huh" another complete stranger said at about mile 1. "Yes he is".
We get home, I leave all groceries in the car, take both kids in, feed L, put her down, give C lunch, unload groceries, put C down. Then sit at computer to vent. Somewhere along the way, I started singing, "I would do anything for love but I won't do that" by Meatload in my head, and about the time I wrapped it all up, I realized, he MUST have been talking about going to Walmart with two kids, two and under, b/c I'm not sure I will EVER do that again...
this has me laughing outloud! :) so funny!
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